YOUR NEW BIRTH SERVICES
During my third birth, I thought I did everything right. I picked the right hospital for a VBAC, a great midwife team and I had a more informed husband. My mistake was not hiring a birth doula. It happened to be that my super sweet young midwife on call had not been to many VBAC's. Her focus was mostly on taking notes and not really guiding me. I felt like she was a regular nurse or doctor on call. A professional in her field but not in natural labor support. I hit transition feels at about 7cm almost 8 and felt that even though I had people in my room, I was alone. Listen, just cause a woman is in the tub does not mean she wants to be alone. Alone and scared of ripping in two (uterine rupture), those contractions came on strong. I was so glad that a few hours later I had my sweet smelling princess, but the feeling of loneliness still bothers me. Why you ask? Well, my husband knew little about support and still needed breaks. Even though we took classes, studied and talked about what to do, when your in the thick venue husbands need guidance. As sweet as our midwife was, she lacked in personal support for us. This is where a knowledgeable birth doula would have benefited my intimidated husband and encouragement him to do massage me, whisper to me encouraging words, breathe with me, kiss me. He was wonderful and but still the unknown of a VBAC was the knowledge that we both have now.
I also believe that men are intimidated to not support because there is to much support and maybe a overbearing mom, sister, midwife or even a birth doula might not initiate e partner to get involved. A partner can quietly take a step back because he might believe in them to support his partner/wife better than he thinks he could. With initiation or guidance, he withdrawals instead of being present. Then the cycle that his mate thinks he withdrawals because he doesn't care to be involved. All along, it is really that he felt inadequate with his instinct or knowledge due to others being better than him. A birth doula that is pro partner/ dad to be involvement would have spoken with their client previously. They also would have worked with the he clients together and possibly give her clients homework for them to practice. At the birth the birth doula, while understanding the clients birth plan, would guide the partner and laboring mom into a a flow, a harmonious dance. Through the transition, this hardworking birthing momma would have a team of plus 2. During the birth of baby, this same birth doula would take a small step back and let them couple enjoy the experience of family.
Fast forward to this couple second birth. This birth mama might not have a clue that her partner felt intimidated. It not easy to admit, even when point blank asked, that you felt weak or inadequate to do a job. Mistrust, lack of confidence even in the smallest things, lack of confidence in her birth ability, and other issues can start to plague the partnership/ marriage. The birth mama now has to carry this burden and make some life choice according to her reality. Mean while her partner has to carry the burden of not being cutout to help. This cycle can only hurt them unless proper guidance and trust rebuilding takes place.
Go ahead call a birth doula, ask for a consultation and breath easier with information. My consultations are free. I am your new birth doula in Lakewood Ranch, Sarasota and Bradenton areas in Central Florida. Hope to talk to you soon.
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
Angela Campano, CBE
YMCA Healthy Kids Day - Interview Your New Birth Doula - Angela Campano
Writing about the YMCA Healthy Kids Day Event
BY JESSICA DE LEON, The Bradenton Herald
BRADENTON -- It was all about helping families Saturday at the Manatee YMCA Healthy Kids Day on the Bradenton Riverwalk.
YMCA representatives said they were thrilled with the turnout estimated at more than 5,000.
"Today is just about promoting healthy families from children to adults," Lisa Strutt said. "So, a lot of vendors here are health conscious." ..........
.....It provided more than just typical health information. Some were introduced to concepts they never even knew existed such as birth doula services.
"There are people who have no idea what I do," Angela Campano said. "That, to me, is exciting and sad."
Doulas provide women non-medical physical and emotional support during their pregnancies, births and afterward.
"The hospitals have completely overtaken women's instincts," Campano said.
Through her service, she hopes to change that by helping woman find their best birth experience.
"I'm there to pamper them and make them feel relaxed," Campano said. "I don't want any woman to feel alone."
Unlike what people may expect from a doula, Campano doesn't just work with midwives. She also won't work with just any doctor.
"I'm pro doctor who's pro woman," Campano said.
She looked at her youngest daughter, and said her growth started far before she was born.
Campano said she started her business, Your New Birth, about a year ago.
"My second birth, 10 years ago, I had a terrible doula," Campano said.
She promised herself then, when she was done raising her children, she would help other women have a better birthing experience.
"One of the best births I did, was a husband-and-wife team," Campano said.
"Great Day for Birth Doulas"
7 Easy Ways to Kick Start a Workout Routine!
It can be tough to get back on track but don't beat yourself up. Kick Start your workout routine with these 7 steps. Spice up your outlook and inspiring change.
In conclusion, weight did not just happen, it took months or years to add on to our bodies. Center yourself, meditate or take time for morning prayer or night time yoga (or both). Take a sea salt bath (helps detox the junk) and breathe. Enjoy laughter (burns calories) and smile more. You will start to glow like you should!
Love & oxox Your New Birth
My VBAC Story.
On 2002, I delivered my first born under 16 hours of epidural. I was naïve, had little to zero support, and with a L&D nurse with no patience or tenderness. I loved my baby beyond belief and had no problems bounding with him after a vaginal birth but what haunted me was the lack of support. For my second Birth, I studied, learned, meditated, hired a doula, had a blessing way party, etc. and was ready to have my baby the natural way. Everything went perfectly natural until pushing time. My overachiever was in distress and after pushing for 2 hours we lost his heartbeat to many times and he was not desending, I as wheeled in for a C-Section. This time my husband and the new hospital staff was amazing and made up for my intimidated, frozen doula. I had never expected or thought I would have a C-Section. I was though proud of myself, more in love with my husband, and amazed at what my body was capable of. I was pregnant again 4 years later and was determined to have my natural vaginal birth. Once again I switched hospitals and hired midwives. Even though I had to drive further, I was not going back to the operating room. The midwives were amazing but I also had to meet with a doctor. The doctor told me that they would let me labor for about 12 hours before they would suggest a C-Section again. Once in labor everything was going as planned until, labor took a bit longer than I expected. That 12 hour mark screamed in my ears and that made transition overwhelming due to my fear of the doctors suggestions. I even remember that he came in to speak with the midwife during the beginning of my transition. I was able to get through it and I birth my VBAC princess a couple of hours later. I love my decision to have a VBAC, despite family, friends and doctors warnings. I would do it all over again with a wonderful birth doula, like me. I am a Birth Doula now because no woman should feel alone even when there are so many people around her. To Support is to Love!
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
As a new mom in 2002, after my new birth, among knowing that I did not want to do things the way my sister-in- laws and sister did, I bought a sling. I knew I wanted to be a stay at home mom and I knew things had to get done around the house. I never wanted to put my baby down and, one day grocery shopping, I ran into this women wearing her baby. I observed her so much that she must have felt uncomfortable. At first, I was like: “Is she pregnant?” and then I saw these toes. I was amazed. Sure enough she turned to see who was staring at her (it might be instinct that we know when someone is staring at us) and I opened my curious mouth. With my naïve voice I said, “Excuse me, what is that thing you are using to carry your baby”. She replied, “A sling.” She was not very forth coming, and as humans Why?? Why do we do that? Why don’t we happily share all the information we know to another human to help make their life better and happier? Ugh… Well, I guess “sling” was the only information I needed, so I naively went to Babies R Us and bought my first sling. Oh, it was uncomfortable but guess who was not, my first born. So if he was comfortable and snuggled then I was happy. I cleaned the house, went grocery shopping without others touching or sneezing near him. I sat on a park bench and maneuvered the sling to cover him while he nursed. This was an old great invention. Slings have been around for thousands of years. Slings are used in the poorest of countries because they know what modern people have forgotten. Carrying your baby provides comfort and warmth to your baby. Carrying your baby or toddler helps to keep them safe and comforted while you work. I vote for out of the house working women to carry their babies and go back to work part time till that baby really decides to come out of that protective cocoon. That just might be my pie in the sky dream for them. Wearing your baby seems so new to our American culture. Our future culture should consider these benefits. Baby wearing provides closeness, not only for the baby, but also for the family unit. It is also easier to care for the child. Baby wearing increases nourishment and emotional soundness. Babies are easier to carry than to get the stroller out and push them in a stroller. If you have more than one child, the newest baby gets that mommy bonding time without the other child reacting as much. Babies hear more conversation and have constant touch, so their development might have an advantage. Baby wearing helps to burn calories and keep you fit. Babies who are carried in a sling cry less than in any other baby containing system. Babies with special needs stay closer and all babies sleep better in a sling. What better way to ask for more massages when your partner, spouse or relatives see that you are carrying your baby and helping the house stay more relaxed. I suggest wearing your baby, trying on a variety of slings and maybe even having two or three different ones with you. Baby consignment shops are a great place to purchase them at good prices, mom’s groups can pass them along as well. Happy shopping for Baby Slings and, Humans, when you know of something beneficial and are asked about it, share ALL the information with joy. Help another Human out!
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
Rushed to Deliver Your Baby?
It may be hard to believe, but trying to rush a birth might make babies take their time. Really, stress hormones can actually send messages to you or your baby that things might not be safe out there. “When is this baby coming?”
Most women say or have heard these words by 37-39 weeks of pregnancy that make them feel rushed to have their baby. Their partners, family, co-workers and yep, even their OBGYN’s, all say similar words. Talk about pressure. Want to find out more about why rushing your baby might make them take their time? Read along and let nature work for you.
Why the pressure?
Why the pressure and from who? Mom not only feels the pressure of her gorgeously huge belly pressing down on her bladder, but the pressure of those around her awaiting this bundle of joy. She hears comments before her due date like:
“When’s that baby gonna get here?”
“What’s taking that baby so long?”
“You look like you’re ready to pop.”
“OMG, you’re still pregnant!”
“You poor thing; will they be inducing you soon?”
From your OBGYN – “Baby seems really big; we should schedule your induction date.”
Talk about Stress!
Besides poor nutrition and lack of water, stress for pregnant women is also damaging. When people are stressed, they produce stress hormones called adrenaline and cortisol. In small and necessary amounts, stress hormones are useful and protective. WebMD is just one site that suggests that when a pregnant body is not in danger but experiences constant levels of these hormones, it could have adverse effects on maternal and fetal health.
Why rush nature?
If your baby is not in danger, studies show that your due date is an estimate on when you might go into labor. Only about 5% of women have their babies on their due dates. That certainly gives wiggle room for other dates. No one has discovered the exact reason for when and why your body starts the labor process. Scientists have few theories, and they deal with hormones released by the fetus itself and/or placenta. Regardless, we are not in charge of the actual labor date. As a birth doula, I like to remind my clients that rushing or stressing will increase those stress hormones, also known as the fight and flight hormones. If your body is experiencing this fight and flight reflex, then your baby might stay put till they feel you are safe. Who really wants to add more stress to their baby’s first real birthday?
So how do you manage feeling rushed?
Wanting the baby to be here is totally normal. Most pregnant women want to have their baby in their arms, smelling them, kissing them, seeing what color hair they have, etc. I remember what I was doing a couple of days before I went into labor with all my babies. I remember those days going by in slow motion. I remember wanting to see my babies like wanting to ________ ( you fill in the blank with something that you most look forward to). It could be your first or your fifth, we all get excited and anxious to fall in love with someone new.
Here are things you can do to pass the time and enjoy the final moments of this pregnancy.
Research inductions and its effect on the natural process of hormones that will help you advance naturally through labor and recover quicker. Once you have done this you can tell that person that asked when the induction would be, to clear their schedule just in case there are induction complications and you need help.
Check off that check list. Are you sure you have everything under control and if you do then….
Regardless of the many things one can do to bring on labor or in case of a medical induction intervention, take a deep breath. Would you rush a butterfly to open and take flight? Would you rush a flower to open, just so you could smell it? Know you will be holding your baby soon enough. They will be walking soon enough. Once they start school, and they are up on stage singing holiday songs with their classmates you will wonder, how time rushed by.
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
Why Not a Birth Doula for Your Planned C-Section?
When I talk with women about their upcoming birth, I love to hear their plans. The ones that are most dismissive of a doula are those with a planned C-section. As someone that had an emergency C-section, I would have benefited from a doula by my side. Scared and unsure of the next set of events, I relied on what the doctors said, not knowing, that once I delivered in this hospital the baby would go with the nurses and I would be sent in a different direction. I was alone without my new sweet smelling white chocolate, as he is still known today, and without my amazing husband. Your baby will be born quickly and accessed ASAP. In Sarasota Memorial Hospital, Lakewood Ranch Medical Center and Manatee Memorial the options for your baby to stay with you are there, if the baby shows no signs of distress. But if the baby does, I am sure the closest person to you (baby’s daddy, your parent, your sibling, etc.) will stay near your baby if possible, but who will stay with you and have the patience not to leave you to find out information about your baby. A birth doula would be that perfect person. She is hired by you to stay with you. So many others will be there for your baby, as it should be, but a doula does not have the anxiety for the baby that say the new grandparent, new auntie, or even best friend will. You want to have those people near to go back and forth and tell you any news. As a birth doula, I would only be there for you. I would be there for you to pray if you would like, to help listen to your worries, pamper you and get you ready to see your baby. New moms should never be left alone. During nearly an hour long procedure to repair you, new moms have plenty of anxiety. As a birth doula my job is to prevent you from becoming frightened and helping you enjoy the cesarean process to the best of the circumstances. If glamming you up is needed, I can help. If a hand massage or scalp massage is wanted, I can help. If pictures of this special time are needed, then I can handle that. A birth doula will recall words that were said and smiles that were given. I might even shed some tears of joy. A doula for an unscheduled cesarean is beyond needed. This event shakes you and all hands on deck. A doula will help calm and reassure you that the best outcome is to protect you and your child. Research also shows that having a birth doula has dropped the C-section rate by 28%. http://evidencebasedbirth.com/the-evidence-for-doulas/
Recovery and postpartum periods with a birth doula will be easier and will help a new mom resume functions with less worry and stress. An extra set of trained loving hands is never wasted during laboring, let alone a cesarean. My initial consultation is free and your thoughts need support. Let’s talk soon.
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
Waiting for baby
You are approaching the finish line, only 3 more weeks or so to go, so you think. This part of time in the whole pregnancy, is where time seems to slow down. If you are a person that has been checking the checklist off for months now, well this time will probably be real difficult if you don't do other things. If you are a person that has not had time for much, then I hope you will enjoy this nesting period. This is the time to enjoy life as it is and not rush it. Trust me all parents will tell you that whether it is your first or your 5th child, your life will change. Why rush it. Take this time to --
Your Laboring Day will be here sooner than you think. Your sweet smelling love bug will be In your arms, nursing on your breast soon enough. Give this baby your happiest emotions, your great oxytocin hormones and enjoy the ride. Rushing and worrying will only give you adrenaline which tells your baby, things out there are dangerous right now, so stay put and enjoy the calm inside of mom's tummy.
Happy Laboring and the Stages it Brings.
Birth goes best if it is not intruded upon by strange people and strange events. It goes best when a woman feels safe enough and free enough to abandon herself to the process.
~Penny Armstrong and Sheryl Feldman, A Midwife's Story
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
Mom's Need You Dad's & Birth Partners!
Not so long ago, typically a laboring mother would go to the hospital, check in, meet her nurses, and after her assessment, they would tell their partner that he would have time to get some rest. That is the saddest thing to me now. I had heard and watched it on the I Love Lucy episode; dad's smoking their cigars in the waiting room. As I speak with women now of all ages, they tell me these stories that sound so uncaring, cruel and lonesome. For example: My father in law was told with his 4th baby, that "it might take a while, so you can go home and sleep". My mother in law had the baby a couple hours later and he was not around. She was alone with strangers in the hospital. Well back then that was the norm, so he went home to sleep. As much as he loves her, I know that if he had the option, he would have stayed right next to her. It was not how hospitals did it back then. Maybe that's just one of the many reasons we have new laboring rooms with an extra bed or a pull out chair. Well Dad's or laboring partners, I am here to tell you, YOU ARE NEEDED! A woman in labor needs to know that she is safe. She needs to know that if she turns to you, she will feel comforted. She needs to feel that what she is doing is special. A laboring woman needs to be treated with respect. She will need everyone's attention, even though she might be pushing you away. Giving her these things and more, will let her let go and help to bring more of the love hormone (oxytocin) into labor. It will help keep the stress hormones at bay. Dads, Partners, what you bring in combination with a birth doula, and a medical care provider that is on board with your birth plan is truly laboring art. The creation is not just the baby but that woman who will nurture, feed, comfort, and love that baby.
Yes, I am a birth doula and would love to be at all the births that women need me at but I have seen them change with that extra support of a spouse, relative or even that caring nurse. In the early stages, it is a great distraction when the support is happy and secure. If the support is nervous and scared, it will show in the the tension that she holds during each contraction which could help stall the process. During the active stage, calmness and comfort is what she might need from that partner. A birth doula will help recognize this and help you help her. In each of these stages, a partner and a birth doula is laboring with this woman. She is the boss and we are her employees. According the text in the 4th edition book of Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn, the Complete Guide, page 245 & page 248, 'Help your partner during contractions by following her lead'.
Dad's, birth partners you are needed but this is not your show. You are the supporting actor or actress. Get rest, stay hydrated, pack snacks for yourself, hire a birth doula, follow her lead and this journey will fulfill not just baby and mom but YOU, too. You just might have Your New Birth.
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
Intimidated Men? In Labor and Delivery - Part 1 the hospital
A true story is the best start. My husband and I thought we saw eye to eye in our birthing wishes. We wrote the birth plan and read the Bradley Method book. We listened attentively in our child birth classes and share thoughts with one another. We thought we were prepared and even if either of us forgot something, we had each other. Nothing could have prepared both of us in our first labor to the beginning of active labor. One contraction, after another rushed through me and the time lapsed by. I was scared and he was scared for me. It did not help that the birthing class we took was hospital based and only showed us simple breathing techniques. I needed support, or should I say we needed support. My husband felt intimidated by a person in which her job was helping woman in labor and delivery. He felt that if I needed construction advice, he would be the one to best help me. Therefore, if his wife needed labor and delivery help, my nurse would be the one to help me. Time after time as I labored, my nurse would not instruct me on swaying my hips, or advice me to take a warm shower, nope, she would just suggest the epidural. "Oh honey, you are in a lot of pain, would you like some relief now". "Oh you poor thing, the epidural will help you feel better". Same words, different arrangement. Here was my husband, helpless and unaware of how to help. Just his slight whisper, honey don't you think it will make you feel better, gave me the push I needed to cave. At 6cm, I left relief. What now? We pressed the hold button on my son's birth. My husband supported me the best he knew how. He was not a labor and delivery nurse, he was not a birth doula nor was he a trained child birth educator specializing in natural delivery. He was put in his place, you can say by some more intelligent person in their practicing field of work. You better believe that if our nurse worked on a construction budget, she would need my husband's help. That is why couples need to be more informed and hire a birth doula. Couples need support from people in that field. If they chose to have a natural or medicated birth, these professionals, along with pro-natural delivery doctors/midwives will help the couple move through each of the stages with confidence that things are going well despite, the discomfort that the woman might be in. Even, if you are having a medicated birth, birth doulas help move it faster. Also, with a birth doula the father of the baby or partner will feel supported and instructed in this process. Partners should not feel helpless. They should get kind Instruction in how to apply pressure, when to stay quiet, when to .... One should NEVER leave a laboring woman alone. A birth doula will be there to help you when you need to use the restroom or take a break to eat or video record, etc.. Just Imagine you are construction manager and you had to go into a classroom full of women and teach them how to have a baby without proper guidance. All you know is construction, you can build a hospital but teacher women the stages of labor and what to do? Now imagine you were the same construction manager, who went to meetings about a woman at birth, took notes and then walked into a classroom with your own personal guide on how to have a baby. Which would you pick? Yes, there is a cost to a birth doula but what could be the cost of not supporting your partner in labor properly? I know the cost and so does not husband, and if could repeat his first birth he would with a birth doula like me. Part 2 coming soon....
Love & OXOX Your New Birth Doula
Once I had my first birth.
Without a birth doula or a mother figure that shared no information or support, I was left to the information I received from close friends, relative, TV shows. I was in the 60-70% women that just followed the crowd. This is funny, because I use to never think I was the follower. Ok, let me give myself some credit. I thought to myself of course I am going to have natural birth, because I have a high pain tolerance. Silly me, having a baby is so much more than pain. All of our body works at the same time to bring a miracle into the world. God created that perfectly. Well, low and behold, the shock of the power of birth made me realize there is a bigger picture. My personal experience made me research the capabilities of my body and the support I truly needed. I admire those women, that are truly in tuned to their instincts and birth alone and naturally the first time. Possibly they witnessed a relative having a baby, or were told positive stories from people, trusted and solely relied on a naturally, peaceful, full of inner strength type of man, whatever the reason, without any information, it is hard to understand what might happen at your first birth. Labor and delivery nurses have a trained job in the hospital. There knowledge is limited to there training. Relying solely on your midwife, might set you up for doubt and pressure on those around you for unlimited support. Especially for your first but should be needed for all, a birth doulas should be there before the birth and only for you right after. She should get to know you and you should get to know her. You can bounce ideas, negative stories, your worries, etc. to help relieve your fears or anxiety. Birth doula can provide so much more, and we will get into that in My Thoughts to come. For now, these quotes, will allow you to think about why spending money on a birth doula is a brilliant investment. I wish I had a birth doula for my first birth.
Love & oxox Your New Birth Doula
Resources: why have a birth doula?
Alexandra’s First New Birth.
This day was quite interesting. The news and social media outlets were calling this day, the last day on earth. I, on the other hand, was about to enjoy a delicious late breakfast with my family. Alexandra called me at about 10:30am. She sounded nervous and excited. She said that she noticed that she was cramping every 10 minutes while talking and resting with a friend. I told her to call her doctor, drink some water and lay down to get some rest. She called me about 1/2 hour later and told me they were getting strong and coming every 7 mins. This increase made me gear up and head over. Upon arriving, she was doing dishes and letting gravity work its magic as I instructed her to. She was excited and a bit scared; she was only 19 years old. I reassured her that having a baby is all those things in one bunch and she was in great hands. We sat down and talked, we walked, we laughed and walked some more. Her surges came quicker and more intense. She tried to stay as long as she could at home but her house mom became nervous. We headed over and they admitted her at only 3cm. Alexandra was relieved to be in the hospital and that made her comfortable. I would have preferred being at home, but this was not my labor. Her labor stalled a little and she became worried. I reassured her that worrying was not going to benefit or help anything. The definition of Labor (noun) is to work, especially physically hard work. Wow, this is it Alexandra, all our talks, all our exercises, all this is now for the labor of your baby. I decided to distract her and pamper her a bit. A warm wash cloth, dim lights, soft music, and a soothing foot rub. Before labor a mom should worry about certain areas she should not get massaged, but now, good strong massages around special points, just made her let go. She relaxed while she labored gently and I worked. The next time the nurse came in, which was about 20 minutes later, she went from 3cm to 5cm and the fun was truly beginning. I set up some R&B music, and we started to dance and move with those rushes. We walked a bit, but she felt more comfortable in the room. To refocus her when the contractions escaped without her, some centering and ocean pictures helped calm her down. She climbed back in bed and we calmed things down again. Dimmer room, ocean waves and more feet rubs. She had been estranged from her mom, but a big part of her, as all women want, is our mother figure during these intense times. Because I was estranged from my mother during all of my labors, I knew what she was feeling. I worked extra hard to be there for this mom to be. She rested as I massaged her and was there to support her through each wave. The door sprung open and her mom popped in. I was not sure what to expect, I just knew I had to act quickly. Her mom saw that Alexandra was in discomfort and was about to disturb the room. I looked into Alexandra' s mom's eyes and told her she was fine and I needed her help. I believe when people are given a task in tense situations they rise to it and she did. She massaged one foot and I another. You could see Alexandra's sense of security. With dimmed lights, ocean waves she moved through each wave gracefully. During one wave, I noticed something was different, something overcame her and I was right. When she finished, she pushed herself up and moved around more freely. She was in her instinctual mood. She wiggled and moaned and I knew things were progressing perfectly. She might have not felt comfortable having pain, but because she was supported, she was calmer receiving the waves and that makes a huge difference. Her birth doula (me) and her estranged mom which was totally behaving were laboring with her. She was safe to relax. With the smell of lavender, ocean waves and good feelings, she trusted enough to let go and she did. Minutes later, she wiggled and moaned and said "I feel like pooping". She must have thought we were crazy, because her mom and I both became overjoyed. We knew she was getting closer. The nurse came in and checked her. Note: because she was laboring and had a birth doula, she did not need anything, the nurses had no reason to check on her every minute. We were all thrilled to learn that all this relaxing, hard labor had started to pay off. She was 8cm. It was 2pm. We had her stand up, and start to dance. With a change of music, a bit more fun atmosphere she got a new wave of energy and moved. She moved from one side to another, she went on all fours; she stood up again and spoke great words to a laboring team, "I GOT TO POOP". The nurse came back in, Bam she was 10cm. She was ready to push. Woohoo. She was doing such a great job, as I cuddled up next to her whispering encouraging words. The nurse even had to tell her to slowdown, since the doctor hadn’t yet arrived. The doctor barely made it, and two perfect pushes and sweet little baby girl was born. The new mama had her new birth, she was tired but after just a few minutes, her energy was back and she wanted food. Precious Union. After congratulations and a bit of pampering, the new mom, sweet baby girl, and new grandma were admiring each other. Tears overcame the room and the young mom paved the way for new beginnings. They had all had a new birth and I witnessed this teamwork's grand prize. Your New Birth Doula, Angela Campano.
Meghan & Tyler's Love Birth
I was approached by Meghan around late July. She wanted a Doula for her second delivery. She explained she had a rough experience with her first. She explained that with her first, her contractions were coming very close together, strong and fast. She went to the hospital in Pennsylvania, they checked her and she had only been 1 cm. They sent them back home and after being at home for an hour or so, her water broke. Back to the hospital she went, and everything that went with it. Continuous monitoring, IV, epidural, etc. She felt defeated and this time she wanted more control. We met on September 11th for the first time. She talked more clearly about her previous birth story and I listened and took many notes during her birth assessment. I got to know her, laughed with her and she got know me. After this meeting, we kept in contact, by phone or text. She updated me with any doctor information and I gave her positive birthing articles for her to read. We focused on the fact that many women can and have done natural deliveries and that trying with a doula was easier than trying by herself.
We met again with her husband, Tyler, on October 21st. I was able to talk with the dad and learn about his fears, sensitivities and see the couple interact with each other. They had a sweet bond and I felt they would make a great team. I met with Meghan again on December 3rd. She was told by her doctor she was 1 cm & 50% effaced. She was so excited and anxious. She wanted the baby to get here fast, since her husband’s schedule was very tight for the coming holidays. I continued to text and call her. I inspired her with meditations, joyful quotes and birth stories. On a Thursday, December 10th, I texted her to see how her doctor appointment went and if they had stripped her membranes. Note: She wanted them to do this procedure, at 38 weeks to rush the baby. She told me her doctor appointment was scheduled for Friday, December 11th and that she would let me know how it went. She did say that she was feeling pressure. At about, 9am on December 11th, she texted me after her doctor appointment saying she was 4cm and 100% effaced, but that the baby’s head had not engaged. We continued to text and she said that her pressure was increasing; this was now 10:10am. She told me she felt contractions and they were coming about 10mins. apart but not strong. I was able to talk with her through the surges and help her giggle through them. She asked me if I thought it was a good idea to call her husband home from the Army reserves in Orlando, Florida. After what I noticed as progression, I told her to call him home and that I would also find a replacement for my substituting teacher job. This was about 10:30am. I told her to carry on with her day at home; I assured her I was on my way. She assured me that her mom was there and she was not alone. I approached her home at about 11:30am. She was walking around, happily. She opened the door and I greeted her, her daughter and mother. We talked, as I monitored her. When she felt a surge, she swayed or walked as I had previously instructed her to do. She wanted to curl her hair, so I grabbed her some water and the apples her daughter had left on the table for her to snack on. I asked her when Tyler, her husband, would be getting home and she said any minute. Note: She also wanted to wait for Tyler to get home. Her contractions were about 7 minutes apart. I felt comfortable enough with time to suggest engaging the baby more. As she curled her hair, a surge came, instead of swaying in a figure 8; she rocked her hips back and forth with a slight squat. She felt a bit different; like that baby had shifted and then carried on curling her hair. Her Husband got home, and this was a tender moment of hugs and kisses. She went back to curling her hair while she talked with him. I gave them some alone time; after all this was her true partner. I suggested for her to lie down for a bit, so she could save some energy. Note: She wanted to try to stay at home. After suggesting she should go lay down, she told me she did not want to do that. Walking made her feel better. I then suggested a light walk, just husband, and their daughter for some bonding time. While she was gone, her mother vacuumed, we lightly cleaned up and I set up a relaxing atmosphere for her to try to rest. I sprayed some lavender around the room; I set up an area where she could socialize but laydown. After her walk, she quickly informed me that it was getting harder to talk through her surges. I recommended for us to leave right away. We rushed around getting things towards the door. Her husband gathered us all for a prayer. This was a beautiful start. Her mother put their daughter in her car, I got in mine and they got in theirs. We headed towards the hospital. We arrived at about 1:15pm. She was checked into a huge suite and immediately monitored. She seems to be handling the waves pretty well for a few minutes. Meghan and Tyler were plucked out of the Best Laboring Team Award Book, they were tender with each other and he kissed her passionately through each rush. I was so proud of both of them and loved that they listened to my suggestions. She trusted her instincts because she was nurtured, pampered and loved through each one of her contractions. At 1:50pm (13:50pm), she was 6cm and 100% effaced +1 station. Though she only was 6cm, 15 mins. later, BOOM she was 9cm and she was in full transition. We worked very hard to support Meghan. Her and her husband kissed, we held her up, massaged her and helped her get into more comfortable positions. She knew instinctually that standing was helping. I whispered that with the next contraction, she should try squatting, and she did perfectly and that was the one. She crawled back up the bed and she said “I am ready to push.” This was at about 2:15pm, a big hospital staff rush, she said she could not control it. It was a beautiful labor. She even said “you mean I am going to have dinner for two. Note: the hospital offers a dinner for the parents, and Meghan had been excited to have that”. Meghan pushed and we gave encouragement. At 2:43pm we welcomed a gorgeous health boy. This was a beautiful experience for this couple and I think the nurse on call as well. The romance, the passion, the humor was outstanding. I wish all mothers would have the support that Precious Meghan had. Her husband, was attentive, supportive and in love with his wife. They made me blush at times and proud to have coached and been there for their beautiful experience. They all achieved a NEW Birth!
What is a New Birth?
As I reflect on my new births, I am blessed to have seen myself be enlightened by this new knowledge. I just did not let the enlightenment pass me by like a movie I watched about myself, I used it. I used this new found change in me to better my life and now the life of my child. One can have many new births (in a sense) from profound life experiences. A religious rite of passage, a wedding, the passing of a loved one, etc… Your New Birth must come from something that shakes your core. As I reflect on the New Birth I had after my first child; this new birth shook my soul. It just did not let me have a little sweet smelling innocent dependent human; it let me see the possibilities of our new family’s responsibilities. As I became weary of the medical process of labor, I also became weary of how my child was treated afterwards. I had a responsibility to ask more questions, seek alternative answers or else do it as others would. I truly had a wonderful doctor during my pregnancy and labor; she was sweet, patient and listened. She unfortunately did not demonstrate full trust in the natural process, or knowledge of it. She, as I did, trusted in the medical route for labor. After all she had trained in it and saw many healthy babies and moms benefit from it. I, on the other hand, trusted in only her. Not having a base of a mother, father or even a person that had natural beneficial experiences in my life, my inner voice was often silenced. Heaven forbid I spoke to those relatives I did have about my natural views; I was instantly made fun of and dismissed as weird. Well once my precious little guy was born, out came this mama bear. Roar!!! I started to question everything, as I remembered how my labor went. I was not going to sit around and let another human (AKA medical person), tell me that that’s the way they have always done it and that is how it should be. I have to say that probably because I had such a stalled, non supported labor, or did not have a fantastic support team to motivate me, and did not have the nerve to speak for myself, it took me a bit to have the confidence to stand up for my wants and views. These are just two (2) examples of the power I used from my New Birth. Vaccine time came, and I just could not understand how a little tiny baby could catch some of those viruses he would not even be in contact with. I had to agree that these vaccines had saved lives but, how was I going to balance the views of my husband, myself, friends and the overbearing preaching from all the medical pediatricians in the practice. Well, I became one of the pioneers in this practice. I said, NO. He will not be allowed to get multiple vaccines. I spaced them out and also waited to make sure he was feeling well, healthy and strong. This mama bear upset many (I was alone in my views) but my child was the beneficiary of my strength. Screw what others thought. I applaud the women who do not vaccinate at all and what they face daily. I also understand that they continue to face challenges every time a virus which there is a vaccine for moves through their area. May God bless them and their children. On top of dealing with the vaccine issue, my gorgeous baby boy had full blow eczema. It was everywhere. Poor thing. I showed the doctors and of course they recommended eucerin cream and hydrocortisone cream. Not knowing anything else, I trusted again, but this was only for a couple of days and then I saw improvement, but wondered about the ingredients. As a licensed facial specialist, I did not like what I saw. On my super slow internet access back then, I researched, and researched and researched. My gut was telling me that these two creams were a band aide and a terrible quick fix. I felt that I had to try what my research and gut was telling me. Since I breastfed him, I gave up dairy and I made an oil from calendula (I like that it has the sound of doula at the end). Calendula officinalis, also known as pot marigold or garden marigold, has been used for centuries for wounds and skin irritations. I used Jojoba oil as the base. Jojoba oil is the closest to the natural sebum of the skin. I had to be patient because once I had all the ingredients; it was to take two weeks for the oil to be infused. Meanwhile, I stopped all dairy and just used jojoba oil on his skin. Just about the time the oil was ready I started noticing a bit less of eczema on my baby boy. The doctors of course told me cold bathing and use those creams. I did the opposite, thanks to my new birth. I bathed him in warm normal baby water. Why? Well warm water opens up the pores, it helps flush out toxins. I also put jojoba oil in the water and then gave him a wonderful spa like massage every night. He was quite spoiled and we bonded with him gracefully. Once the oil was done, I was excited to lather him with it. I was even more excited to show the doctors who were so concerned about him and ready for me to take him to an allergy doctor or run tests. Within a couple of months my son had soft, sweet smelling perfect skin again. Hooray for nature. Supported laboring is where I would have received even more empowerment (could you imagine). I think my husband would have benefited from it as well. It took him a lot longer to have his new birth. Having a baby without a great support team is ok, but having a doula, a husband that knows he can rest and not leave you abandoned will empower you and your marriage. Hooray for Your future New Birth.
Love & oxox Your New Birth Doula
I had to learn not to let anyone push me around, to be brave and to say things I knew might make people mad. Ina May Gaskin